"Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional."
Brené Brown
OCTOBER 2024
Courageous Conversations
Dreading difficult conversations at work? You’re not alone, but avoiding them can do more harm than good. Instead of worrying about being liked, approach these talks with curiosity and respect. It’s not about winning; it’s about mutual understanding. Listen more than you speak, and show genuine interest in the other person’s perspective.
"Research suggests that 70% of workplace conflicts stem from poor communication, so addressing issues directly can prevent bigger problems down the road."
It’s easy to overthink what you’ll say, but tough conversations rarely go according to script. Rather than rehearsing lines in your head all day, focus on asking open-ended questions. If a colleague misses another deadline, try asking, “What challenges are you facing?” This invites a collaborative solution without placing blame. Studies show that 85% of employees feel more engaged when they feel heard, so your genuine attention can transform a tense discussion into a productive one.
Don’t delay! Putting off tricky conversations only builds more tension. By tackling issues head-on, you create opportunities for stronger, more respectful relationships.
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“ A whopping 92% of people report feeling better about workplace
relationships after resolving conflicts ”
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So, next time you're tempted to stay silent, remind yourself that a candid conversation today could lead to better collaboration tomorrow!
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​Top Tips:
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Use Neutral Language: Avoid accusations or language that might put the other person on the defensive. Start with facts and observations rather than personal judgments.
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Focus on Solutions, Not Blame: Frame the conversation around finding a solution or improvement rather than assigning blame. This keeps the conversation productive.
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Stay Calm and Composed: Keep your emotions in check. Take a deep breath before the conversation if you feel anxious or tense. Remaining calm helps maintain a constructive atmosphere.
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Show Empathy and Respect: Acknowledge the other person’s feelings and perspectives, even if you disagree. Empathy can help de-escalate tension and foster mutual respect.
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Be Specific and Focused: Address specific behaviours or incidents rather than making broad statements. This makes the conversation more actionable and less overwhelming.
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Time it Well: Choose an appropriate time for the conversation. Avoid bringing up sensitive topics when either party is stressed or distracted.
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Listen More Than You Speak: Give the other person space to share their perspective. Active listening can help clarify misunderstandings and lead to better solutions.
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Follow Up: After the conversation, summarise key points and agreements. Make a plan to check in later to ensure progress is being made.
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And our favourite tip is: Role-play the conversation. With whom? Perhaps a The Female Forum peer. The power of peers!
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Useful phrases up your sleeve to kick-off difficult conversations with grace & confidence.
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"I’d like to discuss something that’s been on my mind. I value our relationship, and I think it’s important we address this openly."
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"I noticed [specific issue], and I want to better understand your perspective so we can work through it together."
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"I feel like we may not be on the same page about [topic]. Can we take some time to talk it through?"
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"I want to make sure we’re both clear about [situation], and I’d appreciate your input on how we can improve it."
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"This isn’t easy to bring up, but I think it’s important we talk about [issue] so we can find a resolution."
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"I’ve been reflecting on [incident], and I think it’s worth discussing how we move forward from here."